Sunday, March 22, 2009

I wish...

I'm bored so I'm posting. I wish I had some headphones because I much rather listen to music with them, it's easier for me somehow. I wish I could watch a movie I haven't seen in a while like Disturbing Behavior. I wish everyone around me felt better, but I am glad I'm not suffering my usual pain as of late. My brother has been in plenty pain from something getting in his eye and it swelling up. He moaned and screamed for two days straight and it rattled me from any sleep. I spent most of the time reading, just to keep my mind busy. I hate when folks are in pain, especially the important ones in my life. D got some teeth pulled which I was not aware of until recently. So I'm hoping she'll get well soon too. I hate suffering but it's a unfortunate side of the human condition.

I'm browsing music again. I'm trying to find some of those rare albums I have a hell of a time hunting down. I've had a modicum of luck, but still hunting. It always surprises me the amount of music people have that they can share. But I'm very grateful that people share what they have though.

Monday, March 16, 2009

icons ; devour ; still life

I'm having a spur of the moment love for icons. It's been a long time since I sat and really put some effort in some new icons. I uploaded most on my Live Journal. Many of the old ones I never did before. So, today could be the day that I make some new ones.


I watched Devour for the fifth ot sixth time last night and I'm still trying to figure what the hell the plot of that movie really is. It's not the best work Jensen Ackles ever did, and sometimes I wonder why he did it at all. I think the plot was interesting, but somewhere the plot disappears or completely mind fucks you. It all depends on what you think is going on. The first time I watched it, I had no clue what I had just watched. Next time, I was downright plagued by it, trying to find the sense in it. Few times after that I was thinking Jake Gray was the devil's son which is I think what the plot was originally. However, this time, after listening to a buttload of cryptic lines, I just went ahead and came to my own thoughtful conclusion. The character, Jake Gray, is insane. He created this world of the devil in his head. That's all I can think, the movie is just confusing, only an insane person could decifer it.

The movie as a horror movie is on the good side of the horror movie spectrum and I've seen some shitty ones. I think the rewrites during the filming probably deteriorated the intentions of the film. However, the acting is well done and some of the aggressive scenes are a bit loopy, but I like watching it. I think most people who own it is because of Jensen and that's fine. I can watch him in anything, but I prefer him in something more coherent. Some roles I like him in besides the obvious ones (Supernatural!), Eddie G. in Blonde - he had a small role within the four(?) hours of the movie. I loved the way he played his character, silly but debonair. I have to say Alec in Dark Angel because he really brought a character to the show. Just wished the show lasted a little longer than it did.

Speaking of his body of work, I have to talk about the unaired pilot, Still Life, he did for FOX.


First- why did this never air? I found a link for it on a LJ community and downloaded it. I had always wondered what it was about from the two or three pictures floating online from it. I watched the episode from start to finish. And I wish there had been more! I wanted to know what happened to the deceased brother! How he died and why it had to do with a friend of his. I noticed many popular songs from the time were used for the pilot, the opening was wonderfully linked with Coldplay's "Clocks" which set the mood for the entire episode. I liked to believe this could have lasted a few episodes on air if FOX had given it the chance. Damn you, FOX, you love destroying shows don't you?

Second - I wondered if this show had anything to do with that rumor from Dark Angel? I read on Wikipedia (one of the most unreliable places for info), that FOX had wanted the characters, Max (Jessica Alba) and Alec (Jensen Ackles) to hook up. James Cameron, the show's creator was against this, he saw Max and Logan as the couple. But, FOX had some ulterior motive to eventually let Alec have his own spin-off show later on in the same vein as Buffy's Angel. Alec was a popular character among fans but I found it silly for them to be thinking that far ahead. DA was in its second season still establishing a core audience. However, the Friday night schedule spot killed the show's decent ratings and it never returned for a third season. Since they wanted a Alec spin-off, did you think they just took a different step? They figured they already had Jensen on board for Dark Angel and when that sinked, they pulled up another series idea that had been sitting around and figured they could snatch him for that? It seems that's why that was but I think they dropped it last minute. Who knows... I wonder if Jensen Ackles did the pilot before or after his stint on Dawson's Creek?

That's enough ranting...I just had all these thoughts up in my head and I couldn't help but feel like, I don't know. I think some actors get cheated and the fans even more sometimes.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The Effects

I'm suppose to be working on a paper for school, but I was compelled to rant about something that I stumbled upon while working on this paper. I'm doing strong summary responses and the paper is a response to a proposal about how weak high school is and it should be removed completely so teenagers can begin adulthood sooner. It uses the Columbine shootings as an example to the unhealthy environment high school produces for teenagers.

Well, then I went and read up on the Columbine shootings because I was too young when it happened and I was not aware of all the details of the event. I will say you cannot blame high school for why those boys shot their school up. It could have played a small role in one way or other, but it seemed to me they lacked stability as individuals. They lashed out the way they could and they did it in a violent manner. I'm not going to go into detail because I don't live in Colorado and I did not experience anything like that ever in my life.

I just find it silly to point fingers toward public figures for destroying the youths such as Marilyn Manson. I listen to Manson's songs and I don't have an inkling to hurt anybody just from listening to them. If I ever do, it's usually just my mind being violent because I'm angry for a minute. However, I'm sane enough to realize the dire consequences of doing such an act. So really, it's logic stepping in and saying it's wrong. Maybe logic didn't step in and help those boys, maybe they lost all logic to what they were doing. Professionals diagonosed the boys as being a psychopath and a depressive person. Whether I believe that is correct I do believe there was some unbalance of serotonin in their brain chemicals. Something provoked it, and slowly since it was a planned thing. It was planned for two years it seemed. I mean, really? Shouldn't the parents be looking out for their children?

That could be the problem. I'm lucky I stick so securely to my parents. Even when I was dealing with my own disorder, it got to a point where handling it became impossible. I went to my family and looked for help. But I have managed pass my psychological problems which rooted themselves first in high school, do to my untimely depression and other problems which I rather keep to myself. Beyond that, I have come out stronger and better than I once was and I'm surprised I have. I don't hate those boys for what they did but that they did not do something better than what they did do about their problems.

I don't understand why people aggravate things so immensely they radically effect others around. Are people just selfish and hateful? I'd like to believe not. I have anger, I have rage, I have gloom...but I know that it's stupid to let things like that stop you from living your life. Suicide may look like a good idea at the time but it is not an answer. It's not a way. Doing it does not help people understand anything.

Just...I don't know. I'm done with this.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Busy as a Beaver

I've been pretty preoccupied the last few days. I started up my DA Sounds blog for sharing Dark Angel music.

Next, I offered to do screencaps for the movie Thrashin' for a Brooke McCarter fan site. I plan on having those done by the end of the week.

Lastly, I have a paper due on Wednesday for my English class. I plan on working on it all day tomorrow because I don't have a choice. I'm going to try my best with it.

Oh, and very lastly, I have to finish reading The Bell Jar before the 12th, this Thursday. Which reminds me that there will (FINALLY) be a new Supernatural episode this week!

Oi! Saints Preserve Us!

I'm out for now.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

I Say No to Wincest...!

As much as I'd love to be able to take that slash. I just can't! I find nothing wrong with two guys together. Loving each other and everything but I can't read that fiction people write. Especially about the two guys I have such a heart for that are on my favorite show Thursday every week. They are brothers, friends, compadres, and nothing else! Fans just go places I cannot go. I just keep thinking that if they went online and looked at those stories and read a few, their eyes might pop fully out of their sockets.

I think they just don't go there especially when it's brought up. So stop with the snide comments, you remember Jensen's face at the convention last year. They are friends, friends, friends. I have brothers and if people were writing these stories about me doing "things" with them, that would freak the shit outta me! I just can't read it, I tried to just read a bit, but that was too much for me to digest. Maybe just not an NC-17 one. Or maybe one where they didn't talk about "blowing loads". Gosh, I just had a shiver run down my back.

I know so many fans are really into the Wincest/J2, but it just cannot exist for me. I like deep stuff, and so much is like smut. That's okay-a little, but not the whole page! I think women are just hornier these days. Like guys get off on two girls, girls get off on two guys. No! I adore the actors too much to like it. It just destroys them. I hope they've never read that stuff. I think they'd be freaked out.

Boy, Jensen being put on the spot.


I think "disturbing" is the best way to describe it.
Supposedly in a poll, 70% of Supernatural fans are Wincest lovers. I guess I am in the other 30%.
And Jensen, I think your Grandmother will never see it. Unless she's pretty knowledgeable with a computer. Gosh! That has to be so embarrassing.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Damn me for not posting enough. I had a bad day today. I lost my library card and that's one fourth of my life right there. I go to the library all the time for stuff and if I don't find it, well, I have to pay three dollars for a new one. I guess I'm bugged that I can't figure where it went, I checked every place it could, would, and should be, but it was not there. So, I just have to wait for it to pop up when I least expect it to or I go get a new one. Oh life and it's annoying twists and turns.

I've been wanting to listen to the band Travis really bad for the past few hours. I started downloading their discography because I really like them but don't have any of their songs except for one from the Roswell Soundtrack. I wonder if I'll like their newer or older albums? I always wonder that when I get an interest in groups. Like Sugar Ray, originally a punk group with edge that turned into a pop mega machine with "Fly" or Filter that was either alternative or industrial or both that at the turn of pop went with the flow as well. Filter had some good hits like "Take a Picture" and "Best Things" which are completely popped fueled. However, listening to their albums in whole you'll realize they are very well still the groups they were originally. It just helps when your tunes can reflect the times. That reminds me, I should get the Swimfan soundtrack sometime, I had an intense obsession with that soundtrack and the movie at the same time.

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon started this week and I think the show is good. He's not as quirky as Conan was but I think Fallon can have his own show. I remember liking him back on SNL, even though he could not keep a straight face through the Behind the Music ; Blue Oyster Cult skit. Ferrell was too damn funny though. I can admit that, I'd be laughing my ass off if I was a new cast regular too. But back to the talk show, most of his guests are friends of his almost such as Tina Fey or Drew Barrymore. He isn't too formal with the interview, he lets it go whereever it may end up. The opening can have some funny jokes but I'm not impressed with any of the games they've come up with. The game where three people came down on the stage and just had to lick something for ten dollars wasn't that interesting. Fallon had them lick a lawnmower, a fish bowl, and a printer. WTF? Why not a fish or a dirty toilet bowl? Come on, that's like giving away ten bucks for FREE! When the girl got to sing with Bon Jovi was cool but she was so frightened when Bon Jovi came to sing with her. I suppose I would be too, but he wanted to hug her and she looked like she was running away from him. I would not run away from Jon Bon Jovi! I will say the Castle Greyskull was funny with the NYC major. Send me a pic of that , Jimmy!

Well, got to go, the show is on!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Happy 31st Birthday, Jensen!

I'm such a pooper scooper. I forgot it was Jensen's birthday on the first.

(Even though there is a one and a billion chance he would see this, I'm saying it anyway.)
Jensen - I give you warm wishes and good luck in all your future endeavors. I hope you had some fun for your birthday and got some kick ass gifts. Hope the cake was good too, maybe a dark chocolate variety? Happy Birthday and many more to come.

Gosh, I feel young. I wanted to get that out of my system. I could not believe I just forgot about it, I usually mark these things down because I just like to...I'm so strange. Gosh, back to important , boring school work. Nah, I enjoy it...sometimes. Gah, I need to can it. *Kicks self in the head* Wow, I must be really flexible...